So right now at this moment in time, I am sat in the library at college writing this until I have time to go to the next lesson. We will have to do some work when we get home in order to get on top of things. I also just remembered that I need to change my ringtone but I can’t remember how to do it. So it will have to wait until I get home. I’m really thirsty but you’re not supposed to drink in here and you cant drink in the labs either so I’m going to have to sneak a drink in between arriving at the lesson and before we go in. I should probably be working on a lot of stuff related to college or actually write a novel this year but my brain will not let me progress with either of the 2 stories that I started earlier this year. No new ideas are coming to me either.
The bottle that I’m using is actually one that my baby sister got for my dad but he doesn’t use it that much so I seem to have acquired it lately as the seal on my own one has perished and it leaks all over the inside of my bag. Writing like this reminds me of last time I was in college and I would walk all the way down to the park in all weathers in order to write to Elrond…. I suppose at one point you were called Severus. I’m not in a rush to start that all up again. What I should be doing now is my personal statement…Of course, I have gone and left all of those things that would have been helpful to do it behind…
So far I’ve only written the first line of it and am struggling to progress beyond that. Everything needs to be done by December. Which isn’t that far away. Urgh! Sometimes I wonder why I am putting myself through all of this but then I remember everything that we have sacrificed and gained by doing this at all. There were many ideas that never would have happened if we hadn’t gotten ourselves here. I wonder how we can get ourselves here. I wonder how we can get ourselves to do something different than we would have done otherwise. Waiting until we have our next lesson is something that is really taking a lot more time than I thought that it would be. I keep thinking about going cycling which is something that I thought that I would never be able to do, but I really need to be fitter to deal with all the hills around here. In 3 minutes I am going to set off for the next lesson that we are going to. The outside is so grey that I cant tell whether or not there is rain happening outside or whether it is all down to the wind.
Let’s get going then if we want a drink before we go in! Fighting! You can do this!
Because I have really bad cramp in my leg right now I’m writing to you to complain about it.
I’m supposed to be doing work but there are too many noises and the light in this room is hurting my eyes when I look at white things and since this paper isn’t white I feel like I can gather my thoughts better here. I started going more in-depth into my personal statement and found a reason for what I want to do I’m just struggling greatly with the wording of it. I also need to make sure that I apply for a uni open day when I get home. Dad said that he would take me if it was on a weekend. So let’s go and see what’s going on. Also, need to make a list of Uni’s that do my course and do research into them and stuff.
List of things that we need to do when we get home
- Clean dirty clothes
- Put gloves in for wash
- Type up personal statement from what we have
- Find paper that helps you write it
- Type up stuff for biochem assignment
- Charge power bank
- Give baby sister hers back
- Sort files and back them up again
- Put hand cream on hands (where else would it go?)
- Count the words that were voluntarily written to add to the NANO total for today.
Voice hearing Notes
- Do you think this is a good idea?
- I think that it is a good idea for her to do.
- She does need to rest her wrist though
- She knows how much pain she can deal with
- She’s not like she was before
So we are writing again. We need to stop writing about writing. That is one thing that is for certain but I’m pretty sure that it’s one of the few things that is keeping us sane.
Now shall we write a thesis on out visual hallucinations? I feel like this has changed recently. My humanoid visual hallucinations have lost their faces. I mean they never had solid faces, to begin with, but what they look like now is more like a cross between an alien and a ghost. They shimmer weirdly sort of like a Star Trek transporter sequence.
What is more strange is that their clothes aren’t shiny and see through they’re very brightly coloured and substantial.
How many lip products do you own?
I think I have about 19. I only use 4, the rest are multiples. I just started wearing makeup again. To keep up the illusion of being a 24-year-old woman. I regularly feel 12 and act about 8.
A Christmas family will buy me makeup that probably won’t be worn.
I’m not ungrateful it’s just sad.
No-one knows me.
No-one knows who I am.